Your Best Fertility Ally: Fellow Fertility Warriors

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When my husband Brad and I first started this whole “Let’s Have a Baby!” project back in

September 2014, I didn’t tell many people. I naively thought this would be a short-term secret

and we’d reveal our pregnancy in a cute, totally viral-worthy way.

Ha. Ha. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh, so naive.

As this “project” began taking longer and longer, it started seeping into all the other parts of my

life. Physically. Financially. Emotionally. I began turning to my friends for emotional support as

the fear and anxiety surrounding my infertility started feeling way too heavy for me to carry

alone. The support I got from my friends was a mixed bag. While many of them tried to be

there for me, it was hard for them to truly empathize with my struggle. They had no idea what

to say…and with good reason. It’s really tough for anyone who hasn’t been through infertility

firsthand to GET the intensity of the ordeal. Most of my friends wanted to support us, yet they

struggled to be there in a meaningful way that wasn’t just a string of platitudes like, “Try to

relax,” or “It’s going to be fine.” Even my bestest bestie didn’t understand the level of despair I

felt when I’d get my period.


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In the summer of 2016, I hit an emotional low after our first cycle of IVF failed. While the cycle

yielded two blastocysts, after genetic testing we learned both were abnormal,

leaving us no healthy embryos to transfer.

I was heartbroken. No one understood the unique flavor of pain and shame I felt. Well, not NO

one…I learned that a select group of people did understand: other fertility warriors who had

once been where I was, but were now safely on the other side. They were the only ones who

could offer me the support, understanding and perspective I so desperately craved.

It was then I had the idea to create Fruitful, a free fertility mentorship program that connects

individuals struggling through infertility with a mentor who has been through it firsthand

and is now on the other side.

Brad and I got right to work. He’s a web developer and I’m a copywriter and digital marketer, so

together we used our skills to make Fruitful Fertility. We proudly launched the site for National

Infertility Awareness Week on April 23, 2017 and we could not be more proud of the progress

this project has made. To date, we’ve helped connect over 2700 people!

To sign up to receive a mentor or to volunteer to become one, please visit www.fruitfulfertility.org.

Or if you just want to follow along, check out our Instagram account @Fruitful_Fertility.

Remember, you are NOT alone.

Elyse Ash